The older we grow, the more our concept of a “friend” changes, right? As does the way we fraternize with people. For example: try fast-forwarding a few years into the past, and the word “friend” may reflect the face of someone who used to jam to Blink 182’s tracks with us. And that’s a bit unfair because making friends at work is also very important for our well-being as adults.
Delve even further back, and now we would be referring to that one group of kids next door with whom we used to play tag. Nowadays, those definitions of friendship couldn’t be more different from our current reality, could they?
Friendships during our adulthood, and especially those that we cultivate during work hours can be a little startling, if not outright scandalous for most people, to put it mildly. Just thinking of going out of your way to meet and befriend someone new seems tiring enough. We don’t always count on the energy for that. Not in the morning.
At the office, the last thing we want to do is bother someone with non-work-related issues, but sometimes, doing so is for the best only if we care about our mental integrity, of course.
Start Socializing at Work
Imagine spending your whole morning just mindlessly completing every single task you’ve been assigned: answer your emails, join the work conferences, fax something online, and fill out the forms lying on your desk… Task after task, duty after duty. Then, the next day, repeat everything all over again. No interactions, no socializing, and no talking to the person that works next to you. A living hell, if you ask me.
I know that the situation I just described can be perceived as a paradise by the most introverted of people. It’d be a field trip for them, I’m sure. It would be like that during the first few months, at least, and then… They’d be looking forward to switching work and moving to a new company in which people notice their existence.
We, as humans, need social interaction, and that’s no secret. Even if we base the facade of our whole personality on this big, professional, and tough exterior we’ve all put on at some point in our lives.
Yes, everything sounds easier said than done, right? I know I’ve been going on and on about how beneficial meeting new people is, but more often than not, our coworkers are the ones who aren’t that open to making new friends, and, if we’re very fortunate, we won’t hate them. But now, if you want to strengthen bonds and expand your social circle at work, try employing one of the following tips:
Be Yourself
This tip might be the most crucial. After all, why would you like to befriend someone who doesn’t like the real you? Remember your worth, and never go changing your personality just so a random person at work likes you.
This is some mom-level advice, I know. But they’re wise, and so is this mindset.
This does apply to other people as well: let them be who they are. If at the end of the day, the both of you don’t click, then there’s nothing left to do.
Maybe it’ll work out with the person that comes next. Don’t lose your faith, someone who understands your oddities will eventually tag along, believe me, and once that happens, they’re not leaving anytime soon!
Be Open-Minded
Building onto the last paragraph, you too need to let others be. Pay no mind to their religion, culture, sexuality, or race. Everyone has an opinion, and every opinion should be heard – as long as this opinion doesn’t base itself on bigotry and discrimination, of course.
Yes, fighting the urge to shut different opinions down is pretty hard to control, but you have to remember that close-mindedness will take you nowhere. No one would like to be friends with that guy who thinks his opinion is the only valid one in the room.
Being open-minded gives you more opportunities when it comes to connecting to people. You’ll have a chance to welcome new beliefs, ideas, and information that you wouldn’t normally line up with. There’s no harm in that.
Don’t Rush Things
Okay, maybe the first few attempts at making new friends didn’t work out, but so what? There are still dozens of people left who come in and out of the office every single day. Try reaching out to one of them next.
When things are moving slowly, we sometimes think that we should be the ones forcefully steering the relationship our way, but with no consent, the only imaginable course will end up being a tragedy.
Things will turn out in a bad way if you don’t let people move at their rate. If you keep insisting on something they’re not comfortable with, they’ll eventually grow tired of your pushiness and will stay away.
Avoid Clique-like Attitudes
Alright, you just got to the point in which you have a nice group of people to talk to at the office, congratulations! But things don’t conclude here. If someone new arrives, be friendly and approachable.
You were in their shoes only a few months ago, so you understand single-handedly how lonely being in that position felt.
Our workplace is not North Shore High School (yes, the school from Mean Girl), and we’re not Regina George, so why must we fix our attitudes on elitism and hierarchies? Welcome new members aboard with open arms, and you’ll see how big your team gets.
Now that we’ve reached the end, the work environment can be much more pleasing when you have nice people to talk to, right? You could move your matters outside the office’s walls and go out for a drink or two. Who knows? It might be the start of a great friendship.
Don’t confine yourself away from the opportunities of meeting new people. There are many stories to be shared, and I’m sure you have yours as well. These types of relationships work both ways.
See more articles by Jenaro Perdomo.
